Sitting Up

Sitting up late at night to read, blog, and get boys in beds.

Kai sitting up in bed instead of laying down and SLEEPING!!!

T.J. Is now sitting up for long periods of time without assistance. YAY! for another milestone :)

So, this weekend was a long one with Labor Day and all and I found myself staying up much later than I should and later than normal. By nature I am a night owl and it seems to intensify over the weekends because David is home (not at work) and his schedule is different. I think part of me is so excited to have him home that I want to stay up late with him and spend as much time as possible with him. Also, when the boys are FINALLY asleep, that's when I feel like I can actually get stuff done without any interruption. During the week I try to take advantage of nap time, but that doesn't always work out with two boys on different schedules.

To illustrate this sleeping dilemma... I am currently sitting on the couch with T.J. In my lap bundled up ready for bed, but his weary eyes are battling to stay open. Kai was sent to his bed over an hour ago but the renegade is now laying on the other side of the couch. I would normal not relent to him being out on then couch with me but he is "sick" so I'm being nice. Im not dure how it works in other families, but going to bed for my boys never seems to follow the routine I attempt to lay out every night. Bath, brush teeth, bedtime story, prayers, etc. It doesn't matter what I do, most nights as soon as David walks out the door Kai is awake and alert and needing something. For example tonight, as soon as I turn the deadbolt locking the door after David's departure I hear Kai's small voice "I'm stinky". Ugh.

Sitting up and thinking/analyzing my execution of my motherly duties at the end of everyday. What did I do wrong? What did I do right? What do I need to change? How can I do better? I try to focus on the boys individually too. Am I meeting T.J.'s needs? Am I encouraging his growth and development strongly enough? Why is Kai not potty-trained yet? How can he be so SWEET and so FRUSTRATING at the same time? I pray for patience and understanding so that I can be the best mom for my boys because I love them so much and they deserve to have the best mom, just like all of God's precious children.

Sitting up is a skill we all learn as infants. T.J. is still mastering it. We develop our skills and use them according to our wills. Kai uses sitting up to stall going to sleep. We then discover how to balance our will with the demands of our lives. Mommy sitting up late to finish what she could not complete with the children awake. After realizing we can't have all that we want and need we have to find the right balance that brings the greatest happiness. Ultimately, for me this comes when I align my will with the Lord's will. I meet my children's needs that are warranted without neglecting my own. It's a continual process...

Kai is now sitting up on his dresser. Excuse me...